Nobody ever leads with the men in terms of awards show fashion rundowns. For good reason sure -- let me guess, a black tux?! I'm totally psychic) But why play to expectations every time? If we don't give them their due right now we'll actually forget and I'm well aware that some readers get annoyed that we only ever drool on the actresses 'round these parts.
So here ya go. Brad Pitt wasn't the only one having tie adjustment problems. Ryan Gosling didn't have Angie beside him so he had to do the dirty work himself.
Meanwhile, Joseph Gordon Levitt wore a red button. I'm pretty sure that if one were to investigate one couldfind out what the red button means . But isn't it more fun to assume he'd just been sold at a gallery prior to the show, being a work of art and all? How much would he go for at Sothebys? (Your best price estimates in the comments, please)
AFTER THE JUMP: March of the Handsome Penguins.
The Superstars...
Mr.Jolie, Jakey, Sherlock and Captain JackBrad Pitt wins major points for being so perfect for Angelina Jolie. You'd think the tabloids would give up about trying to break them up already. I bet we have another Woodward/Newman here or at least a Liz/Dick... I think we've got a for keeps situation. Oh sure, you can say 'Jake Gyllenhaal ain't no superstar, Nathaniel!' but shut up. He is to me. He's the most traditionally garbed of the men. RDJ and Johnny Depp put their own stamp on the traditional formal wear (though this is sedate for Depp). But sometimes people hate that, men having fashion stamps.
Gosling, Garfield, Eisenberg, Renner and Franco Look I, uh, made my own Vanity Fair cover! Superstars Class of 2014: Ryan Gosling, Andrew Garfield, Jesse Eisenberg, Jeremy Renner and James Franco... I suppose it's possible that one or three of them have peaked already (given that many Hollywood star's ascendance is also their peak. Look it up.) But aren't you looking forward to future performances from all five? Their possibly entering their creative peak.
Time for a poll!
Moving on...
Kwanten, Efron, Hammer, Quaid and "Carlos"
Ryan Kwanten gets a spot in the lineup because of True Blood withdrawal; I included Zac Efron because I was horrified that he got to introduce The Kids Are All Right while Michelle Pfeiffer had to settle for Wonderland. To rub salt into this petty wound, Efron has just confirmed that he will be in New Year's Eve which means he will have now made TWO movies with Michelle Pfeiffer; Armie Hammer (The Social Network) is 6'5" I'm sure I probably shrunk him here like a mad scientist just to fit him in the frame. He will tower over Leonardo DiCaprio when they play lovers in Clint Eastwood's J. Edgar (2012). Will they give Leo (who is 6') a box to stand on?; And we end with Dennis Quaid and Edgar Ramirez (Carlos) because the combined handsome is off the charts.