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« What's on your Cinematic mind? | Main | The Linking Cure »
Friday
Mar092012

Say What, Lone Ranger

Amuse us in the comments by adding a caption or dialogue to this first still from Gore Verbinksi's The Lone Ranger starring Johnny Depp as Tonto and Armie Hammer as the titular hero.

The Lone Ranger is a weird name since you always think of this story in terms of its pair, right?

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Reader Comments (28)

The legendary, loose-limbed Jack Sparrow reincarnates into a more extravagant Native American version of himself. He'll the steal the show from the hunky dude once again (just look at his gaze).

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBVR

Johnny: No, seriously. I make a better aged Clyde Tolson than you in this getup.

Armie: I'm so hurt I can't even look at you!

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJoey

"Do you think Gore's going to keep this thing under 150 minutes for once?"

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBrian Z

"now you're SURE you don't wanna switch hats?"

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterabstew

Johnny: "Hmm...not really what I was expecting for Pirates 5."

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRyan M

Johnny: "Hmm...not really what I was expecting for Pirates 5."

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRyan M

Looks like a fashion shoot in GQ or W.

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBia

RuPaul: "Lone Ranger - Shante, you stay. Tonto - sashay away."

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRahulio

(Silence. Only some background noise is heard while the characters, on their horses, reflect upon life and their fate. Just like as it happens in laundromats in independent movies)

Hammer: Just look at my ears in this hat

Depp (pauses. He tries to hide his discontent with life, his years in drag he thought were over. But instead, his partner is the vicarious recipient of his accumulated anger): I'm wearing a full bird in my head. (Another pause while memories of an orange wig and some stupid dance make his anger grow inside) I don't think you can complain.

Hammer: this picture isn't gritty enough for us to have this conversation.

Depp (long pause, subsiding a bit): I know.

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered Commenteriggy

Ha!
Maybe, just maybe I got carried away.

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered Commenteriggy

Maybe it's just me, but I'm upset that a caucasian actor is portraying a native american.

We don't do blackface or yellowface anymore, so what's with "white tonto"?

Well actually, I know what's with "white tonto" - money. A known name and actor with the proven ability to put asses into the cinema was gonna be cast in one of the major roles. Armie isn't bigger enough yet for the studios to take the risk of putting it all on him. So naturally, the other role had to be filled by someone with celeb power.

Still, this rankles. Adam Beach, the handsome aboriginal actor should have been cast instead imo.

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBlinking Cursor

Johnny Depp is doing the " I smell the fart" kind of acting expression while Hammer is posing and trying to showcase the cheekbones as much as he can.

Joey meets Zoolander

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterManuel

I was about to say "a white man playing a Native American - didn't we stop doing that nonsense 40 years ago at least?" But Blinking Cursor beat me to it.

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJanice

Janice & Blinking -- But Johnny Depp is actually Cherokee so it's fine. This is one situation where it's not what people usually rightfully bitch about :)

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNathaniel R

Originally I was planning to wear a fabulous feather headdress that went down to my knees but budget cutbacks reduced that to putting a dead bird on my head.

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterVaus

This isn't actually a Lone Ranger still; it's a shot from one of Armie Hammer's pot parties...

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMatthew

Johnny's thinking: "Even with that mask on, I can only picture this guy as he looked with that awful 'J.Edgar' make up on"

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCarlos

I would expect more rightful bitching. Let's make a (really big) leap and assume that activists within native communities will be satisfied with the excuse that JD is 1/4 or 1/8 Cherokee (is Tonto Cherokee? Can we assume that they'll even make that distinction? I guess Tonto will at least be Cherokee in the same way that Ziyi Zhang and Michelle Yeoh are Japanese). The problems won't end there. Historically, Tonto is super problematic, and the filmmakers will have to jump through a lot of hoops to create a character with no baggage. Are the face paint and dead bird on head typical to any particular native tradition? I wonder if we'll even find out.

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGaren

Isn't this called "Tonto and the Lone Ranger"?

Johnny Depp should be ashamed of himself. He's phoned in so many performances lately it's criminal. No Oscar for you! That makeup for Tonto is out of a amateur KISS concert. I hope that he's slammed by the Native American community for doing this role.

March 10, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNed

it's the screen test for the reboot of Batman: do we see the next batman and the next Joker?

March 10, 2012 | Unregistered Commentercaro

@Nathaniel - thanks for the info I didn't know that.

That said - Depp, again? Eh. If this were a REALLY subversive take on the story, upending the whole thing and being with Tonto at the center, then - maybe. I can't get excited by anything Depp does anymore, which is a shame. I'd love to see him surprise again.

March 10, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJanice

"Historically, Tonto is super problematic..."

I believe addressing that is part of the premise of this remake.

March 10, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPaul Outlaw

Maybe I'm just not paying enough attention, but it only seems to happen with Native American characters that actors trot out the "well, I'm actually 1/8 Native" or 1/16, or however far back they can bluff it hoping it'll be enough. Do we ever see actors say they're 1/8 African and that makes it okay for them to dress in a mish-mash of African-looking dress and play a representative of their supposed heritage in a blockbuster? (I'm actually curious about that as I can't think of any, but I may just not be informed enough.)

March 10, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterD

If you think Depp's look is original then check this out for possible inspiration
http://www.firstpeople.us/native-american-art-for-sale/kirby-sattler/i-am-crow-detail.html

March 10, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterVaus

Native americans only make up about %1 of the population in America, with most of them not giving acting careers a second thought,so, I'll take Johnny Depp if that's the deal.

March 11, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPoppy

Adam Beach is the only Native American talent I can think of, and even he's somewhat mediocre. So no, casting a non-Native American as Tonto isn't a problem if there aren't any great actors of such descent out there.

March 11, 2012 | Unregistered Commentertonyr

So Depp being 1/8 Cherokee makes this nonsense okay with people? Your mileage is certanly different from mines. Good to know then.

March 11, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMinx

Guys, trust me; the idea that there are no Native-American actors out there who would fit the role other than 1/8 of Johnny Depp... sorry, you're just deluding yourselves. There are millions of actors in the world.

March 11, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTim
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