Cast This! "Baby Jane" the Remake That Should Never Happen But Is Fun To Theoretically Cast
Thursday, July 12, 2012 at 7:01AM By now you must have heard that horriblest of horrible news: Walter Hill is planning a remake of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? Why? Why? Why? Won't Carrie 2013 be tragedy enough? But after the brief psychotic break I experienced after reading the news (I stood under an overhead light and swayed inconsolably while holding my Madonna doll) I realized that Whatever Happened to Baby Jane is really fun to enjoy in whichever way it comes to you. I love any spoof or homage. I just don't need a remake.
Luke at Journalistic Skepticism, who came up with a funny casting reunion suggestion, asked me to discuss. And I can't fight it. I readily concede that even though I don't want the film remade, it's super fun to theoretically cast.
Nick joked on twitter that Hollywood would obviously go with oldies like Charlize Theron and Reese Witherspoon which is funny because it's horrible and true. If they go older, they'll obviously offer it to Streep & Somebody. But I think you should go with 50somethings. My brilliant suggestion after the jump...
Former Oscar Nominees With Currently Underused Star Mojo
My first thought was Sharon Stone who I'd immediately shove in the wheelchair. Stone's most famous roles play on her strength so I'd victimize her. And my second abso-brilliant idea, which it took me a long time to land come to, was Jennifer Tilly as the batshit crazy former child star. She still sounds like a child but she is such a funny underused actress capable of truly great work (see: Bullets Over Broadway and Bound). They were both born in 1958 and you want people who are at least close in age.
But truth be told, if they must ressurect it, it'd be so much more awesome as a stage play starring Kathleen Turner in all of the roles like Alan Cumming's One Man Macbeth or something. Kathleen Turner is magic on stage and she prefers it to the movies. It wouldn't feel like a useless useless thing since we still have and love the original classic movie and don't need another one.
Who would you like to imagine in the roles even though nobody should ever play them again since Bette & Joan did it perfectly the first time?
Anyone else remember and love the MTV Madonna/Courtney Love Baby Jane mashup?
Reader Comments (67)
Elle and Dakota
I hate the idea of a remake, too much of a classic. But if I had to choose it would be Streep and Lange. Who should we cast in the Victor Buono role?
Brandz -- ugh. i know they'd go with Philip Seymour HOffman. blech.
Magicub -- LOLx15
I actually think Jennifer Tilly is an amazing choice! She is so underused and she knows how to do camp very well.
@Leigh - Thanks for the info about the play. I'd never heard of it and I love Greta Scacchi.
Googled it and immediately found a terrific shot of her in full Baby Jane cackle mode.
Get a time machine and make Carey Mulligan and Michelle Williams old. Makeup can look too silly if the age difference is too big. Hit: Streep as Margaret. Miss: Leo as J. Edgar.
There's so many choices. Tilly is a great idea, though the movie would instantly be classified B sadly. Winona Rider could continue her trend of washed up actress, too.
Another great pair, IMO, is Sigourney Weaver as Blanche and Anjelica Huston as Jane.
I love this movie and i'm against a remake but i like the idea of a movie about during the shooting of the film! But please Hollywood don´t give Melissa Leo a part, before Leo is in I would go with Rivers and Griffin...
Goldie Hawn and Jackie Weaver... nice!
Jessica Lange and Sigourney Weaver, the best choice !
Viola Davis and Angela Bassett!!!
Meryl + X older contemporary actress. YAWN. And you know it's going to go down like that.
They should reboot it to "Whatever Happened to Baby Jake?", starring Joel Grey as BABY JAKE and Richard Chamberlain as "Blanchard." I'd see the hell out of that film. Or a musical of any sort with this material, male or female, if they must do an unnecessary remake of this camp classic.
Miscellanea:
* Somebody already mentioned that there was a TV-movie remake with the Redgrave sisters. It was a decent little film and the casting was inspired.
* A few months ago I read a list of biopics in the works. It was one of those imdb lists prepared by subscribers, but they make reference to films actually in development. One such film was a retelling of the shooting of Baby Jane, centering on the rivalry between Davis and Crawford. I have not found the list. I wonder if it will be ever made and, most importantly, who would play Davis and Crawford!
* Now the real casting coup (some ten years ago) would have been the casting or arch-rival sisters de Havilland and Fontaine for the remake. In any case, I don't think they would have consented to it even then. Now the ladies are in their 90s, and they have hated each other for 70 years! Their problems were first made evident at the 1942 Oscars, when Joan approached Olivia to congratulate her on her victory and Olivia brushed her aside saying something like "Why does she do this when she knows how I feel!"
* I would love Meryl and Glenn to play the roles (Blanche and Jane, respectively).
* Better still, I would have loved to see them in the projected Mary Queen of Scots remake that never came to be.
* I believe my third and fourth choices are Jessica Lange and Susan Sarandon.
* BTW, in my opinion Susan Sarandon would be THE right actress to play Margo Channing if they ever make the mistake of remaking it!
Jane Alexander and Charlotte Rampling
Jane Fonda and Liv Ullmann
Michelle Pfeiffer and Sharon Stone
Kristin Scott Thomas and Olivia Wilde
Cate Blanchett and Tilda Swinton
Lena Olin and Helen Mirren
Parker Posey and Jennifer Jason Leigh
I really don't understand why comments are centering on actresses in their fifties or even forties! By today's standards, a situation like that of the movie would be more likely in women in their sixties!
Not only Streep and Close...
Fonda and Burstyn
Julie Christie and Glenda Jackson (in a comeback performance)
Streisand and Cher, or Streisand and Midler
John Travolta and Tom Cruise.
Maggie Smith and Judi Dench !!!!!
Tilda Swinton & Cate Blanchett
or better yet,
Cate Blanchett (revved up in age) & Meryl Streep - two oft-compared titans,
or best of all to me
Jessica Lange & Glenn Close