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« Sandra at the Top | Main | Curio: Kino Kicks »
Tuesday
Aug052014

The Normal Heart of True Blood Seasons

Sarah or "Noomi"?Here's Adam continuing the march to True Blood's "true death" in just a few weeks...

Alright, so first thing first, does anybody remember last week’s episode? I was racking my brain trying to remember just what the hell happened, and all I can come up with is Sarah Newlin is the new Jesus and Bill went all Red Eye and stabbed a lawyer through in the throat when he didn’t get his way. So…there’s last week’s recap.

Now, on to this weekend's episode "May Be The Last Time"

True Blood was doing soooo well for a few episodes. Plot lines were moving forward, and when they weren’t, characters were growing and deepening, a real rarity in the True Blood universe. Even if this weeks episode wasn’t terrible lets just say that while watching the episode I became increasingly more entranced by the homemade ice cream I made (just two frozen bananas & almond milk blended in a Magic Bullet! Who knew?) than by what was actually happening on the screen.

In between mouthfuls of my glorified frozen banana puree, these thoughts pop in my head...



Ugh, why does Carrie Preston have the stomach I’ve always wanted?

When Arlene was giving Sam advice as whether to leave and move in with whats her baby mama face or stay put in Bon Temps, I could’ve sworn she was going to ask him, “If you left, would anybody notice?”


When Andy and Holly were peering through the screen door looking for Adilyn and Wade, all I kept thinking was #TrueDetectiveSeason2. Or, somebody give them a buddy comedy to star in!

When Bill and Sookie were fornicating on the floor (hellloooo season 1 flashback), was anybody else just dying to see Bill, in Old Glory fashion, explode in a bloody hot spring while inside her?

So, if this if this is The Normal Heart of True Blood seasons, then that totally makes Dr. Ludwig Julia Roberts, right?

Does Sam even perform Mayoral duties?

Watching Sarah Newlin’s mental breakdown, I couldn’t help but think that her character really is just a combination of waiting-at-the-train-station Virginia Woolf and just-got-accepted-into-the-intern-program Elle Woods. For real. Mix Virginia pleading to Leonard, “If  it is a choice between Richmond and death, I choose death” with Elle backing away from that sheet of paper with her name on it, “Me!” for Sarah when she's asked to choose between Buddhism or Christianity before she dies...

I choose neither! I choose me! I am the cure! I am the messiah! I choose myself!”

 

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Reader Comments (10)

YES to Sarah Newlin insanity! Sarah Newlin is the most fantastically bizarre crossover between New Age yuppie philosophy, Evangelical zealotry, and those awful "Lean In" self-help books. Hands down my favorite part of the episode.

August 5, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAnne Marie

I love Sarah Newlin, too. such a genius stroke to make her suddenly new agey but in a completely self-serving self-aggrandazing way. Noo Mi. haha.

I genuinely LOLed at "does Sam do any mayoral duties?" - that is the easiest paycheck ever!

August 5, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterNathaniel R

Maybe if Sarah Newlin can survive long enough to the next local government elections she can run against Sam for mayor of Bon Temps!

August 5, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAdam

"anybody else just dying to see Bill, in Old Glory fashion, explode in a bloody hot spring while inside her?"

LMAO. That's utterly ridiculous/fantastic.

I love how Sookie changed into a flimsy dress, dramatically ran over to Bill's house guided by her bouncing bosom and gave him some good old fashioned "I'm sorry I gave you a fatal disease" sex.

But pretty much nothing made sense in this last episode.

August 5, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDerreck.

i agree about sam, I'm rewatching the whole series and I noticed come season 3 I started just fast forwarding anything that had to do with him unless sookie, bill, eric or jason were talking to him. Otherwise I just didn't care.

August 5, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMegan

i can't believe there's no mention of Arlene in this review. Carrie Preston was incredible in this episode, i mean, the sex scene was so hot and the moment when she's dancing with Keith and tells him they can't have sex slayed me

August 5, 2014 | Unregistered Commentereduardo

Eduardo - Carrie preston is just a goddamn SAINT. She's pretty fucking stellar this season, having some wonderful material to work with!

August 5, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAdam

I thought about an exploding Bill too. Especially since I don't care about him or his flashbacks! I don't care about past Bon Temps!

August 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJoaoVB

I loved Sarah's scenes this week. That is how I like to remember Steve Newlin as well. Vampire Newlin was a let down.

August 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterBrittani

JoaoVB - I would TOTALLY give a fuck about past Bon Temps if there was anything to give a fuck about. Aside from Fangtasia's birth, zero fucks were given.

Brittani - I hope they don't let the momentum on Sarah's scenes falter. It looks like she's leading up to one hell of a climax!

August 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAdam
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