Swing, Tarzan, Swing! Ch.1: Buster Crabbe's Loincloth
Sunday, May 8, 2016 at 11:09AM New Miniseries! As we approach the release of The Legend of Tarzan (2016) we'll be ogling past screen incarnations of the Lord of the Apes each weekend like we're going to an old timey matinee.
We begin with Buster Crabbe as Tarzan the Fearless (1933) who looks much better in this movie than implied on the poster which imagines him from maxi-challenge workroom outtakes from RuPaul's Drag Race. Blend, man, blend!
This next image is more flattering I promise...
Ahhh. Much better.
The history of Tarzan the Fearless is a bit confusing as Tarzan was an exceedingly popular character ninety years back and there were immediately multiple versions, some concurrently. Perhaps its the ur franchise & reboot property? Between 1918 and 1935 there were six Tarzans: Elmo Lincoln, James Pierce, and Frank Merrill starred in silent serials; Johnny Weismuller, the most famous incarnation, began playing Tarzan in features; and Buster Crabbe and Herman Brix got the B job of headlining early sound serials. Serials were of course short films with cliffhangers that used to precede features in movies theaters. Before this magical device named "television" was invented people had to leave their homes for longform narratives. Gasp.
Let's consider this film, stitched together from 12 serials, a warm up for Buster Crabbe's next two serial roles that would come to define his career: Flash Gordon from 1936 through 1940 and Buck Rogers in 1939. It's smart to consider it so, since Tarzan the Fearless isn't a good showcase for anything other than his Olympian body, arguably the best Tarzan body pre-80s, depending on how you like them. But the acting. Oy. Crabbe plays Tarzan like a brain damaged but happy chuckling child. Even Crabbe's hair, usually blonde, short and fetching in most projects, is unflattering here in a curly brunette mop.
A few highlights from the serial for your amusement so that you don't have to watch it yourself (because it's terrible!)
The titles at the beginning tell us that this will be one of Tarzan's strangest and most romantic adventures but THEY LIE. Romantic? Well, Tarzan does get pretty handsy with Cheetah in a tickle and spanking fight. Strange? He has a delightfully odd way of eating berries while hanging from vines.
In the first action scene, Tarzan spots a lion about to eat a trapped antelope and he attacks by leaping on its back and then rolling around with it fighting.
Leo ate a raw bison liver and was cold filming The Revenant -- blah blah blah -- but he would have shit his pants if he actually had to perform this scene with a live lion! There are no edits or computer generated claws in this scene. That's an actual lion with Buster and/or his stunt double. They roll around together and knock each other over and leap on each other and at one point Tarzan's arm is even in the lion's mouth. Out of curiosity I looked up Buster Crabbe and Lions on the internet and this image popped up.
That's Buster Crabbe eating lunch with a lion named "Jack" in 1933 (and it's far from the only pic with Buster & big cats) so he was pretty comfortable around them. What was it with Hollywood and lions back in the day?
The other characters in Tarzan the Fearless are mostly duds. Take these three:
That's the villains Jeff (Philo McCullough) and Nick (Matthew Betz) whose defining character trait beyond an evil stare is hoisting his pants up in every scene. And then we have Tarzan's Jane -- oops her name is "Mary" (Jacqueline Wells) in this one -- who is completely entitled and obnoxious.
Your father's directions are perfectly clear!
But I loved Mary's beau Bob (Edward Woods) or at least felt for him because he gets stuck with that thankless stock part of the fully decent handsome boyfriend who just isn't "the one". Think Bill Pullman in 90s romantic comedies. He also gets terrible lines which he says with absolute conviction.
As in The Creature From the Black Lagoon Mary goes for a swim without telling the men and gets herself into big trouble. Tarzan saves her from an alligator in a far less convincing fight than with the lion. It's edited with the desperately slight of hand of Richard Gere "tap dancing" in Chicago, only more primitively. And then there's this cute bit where he recognizes her from a photo her father (who Tarzan is friends with - no explanation given) which he carried in his wallet.
And by wallet I mean loincloth.
He keeps EVERYTHING in there which means he's constantly fiddling with his loincloth, shoving things in it and pulling things out of it like it's Mary Poppin's bottomless bag.
Of costuming interest:
Believe it or not these are NOT images of Buster Crabbe as Tarzan but Buster Crabbe in one of his other jungle man roles (he made several) and he's wearing the exact same costume! Studios were so frugal. And leopard skins were apparently "in" all throughout the 1930s apparently. (Sorry panthers, lions, and tigers.) Note that though a different movie, it's the same cut and print.
Standards of modesty change with the decades and it's kind of fascinating to note that men's lower butts and thighs are now what's verboten (think swimwear and cargo shorts or wearing jeans halfway down the butt) but back in the 30s it was the complete opposite. The lower stomach and upper ass were strictly off limits but exposed butt cheecks and thighs were just fine. That makes for a weird diaper effect with these loincloths, don'cha think?
Okay, I'm bored so let's wrap up with a quick list
7 more stray observations from the rest of Tarzan the Fearless
1. Tarzan enjoys a good rainshower.
2. For some reason Tarzan isn't a Greystoke in this movie but descended from the "Greyfriars." Also the Greyfriars are dumb if they don't realize this letter will entice people to kill Tarzan themselves for the cash.
3. Tarzan has performance anxiety with Mary (this is as close as they get to a kiss and he looks away) but will totally kiss his ape friends.
4. There are nowhere close to enough elephants in this movie. Elephants are seriously the best.
5. As soon as Tarzan has a few words under his belt he uses them to claim Mary as "mine" and starts bossing her around. Threatens to hit her if she disobeys. Charming. Men are the worst!
6. No.... we can never escape those damn Infinity Stones! The final few chapters in this serial involve one of the bad guys stealing a stone from this Egyptian statue and then the High Priest is out for revenge for desecrating the temple.
7. Mischa Auer! He's all 'Before I kill you, you must know the ancient prophecy: I will be the only future Oscar nominee from this movie!"
All Chapters:
Ch. 1 Buster Crabbe in Tarzan the Fearless (1933)
Ch. 2 Johnny Weissmuller & Maureen O'Sullivan in Tarzan and His Mate (1934)
Archive Extra: Tarzan the Ape Man (1932)
Ch. 3 Lex Barker in Tarzan's Peril (1951)
Ch. 4 Gordon Scott in Tarzan's Great Adventure (1959)
Ch. 5 Mike Henry in Tarzan and The Valley of Gold (1966)
Ch. 6 Bo Derek & Miles O'Keeffe in Tarzan the Ape Man (1980)
Ch. 7 Oscar loves Greystoke, The Legend of Tarzan: Lord of the Apes (1984)
Reader Comments (9)
This is one of the funniest posts you've ever done, Nathaniel. The line about Richard Gere's "tap dancing" was so hilariously decontextual, and the sociological analysis of male butt-cheek exposure makes me think you should write a Ph.D. dissertation. It would certainly be more interesting and scholarly than most.
I've never seen this particular Tarzan, thankfully, but have witnessed some of Crabbe's other "acting" and as an actor he was a very attractive and well built piece of wood.
Poor Mischa Auer! But such was being a contract player in the studio system.
Owen & Joel -- yay! thanks for reading. Posts about Tarzan are never appreciated but for whatever dumb reason I like Tarzan movies even though they're always bad.
i'm sure panthers, lions and tigers were fine with the leopards taking the fashion fall
now fast forward to miles o'keefe!!!
[no reason....]
Crabbe was a beautiful man- and great action hero
Tarzan movies aren't always bad. Tarzan And His Mate (1934) isn't merely the best Tarzan movie ever, it's simply a great film. Period.
Not as great as Marzan And His Tate, but certainly good enough are Tarzan The Ape Man (1932), Greystoke (1984) and the Disney Tarzan (1999). Actually, I think that all the Weissmuller films are okay, except for maybe the last two (Nazrat And The Huntress/Mermaids).
As you can see, I at least appreciate posts about Tarzan (certainly more than posts about Marvel movies). So please continue with this miniseries. But without unnecessarily badmouthing its subject matter.
Fun post. It all looks so ridiculous now. What will our blockbusters look like 90 years from now?
Willy - i'm not badmouthing Tarzan movies per se. But Tarzan the Fearless IS terrible. See it and you'll know. If you missed the post on Tarzan The Ape Man (1932) a few years ago know that I thought that was quite good and super Pre-Code sexy.
San Fran --right? Sometimes it doesn't even take 90 years. We just looked back at Ghostbusters which had a visual fx nomination 25 years ago and it looked so cheap!
I'm just going to leave this link here:
http://pre-code.com/tag/buster-crabbe/
and just say it's funny, it's naughty and it's NSFW.
I grew up with Ron Ely on the 70's version, so he's always been my Tarzan. mmmm loincloths!