True Blood 4.9 "Let's Get Out of Here"

Run Alcides, Run. This episode finally gives you weres and shifters some room to move. Take advantage of it.

Joe Mangianello as Alcides.

"Let's Get Out of Here"
But, alas, Alcides isn't fast enough. Bill snatches Sookie from his arms to rescue her from certain death in the pre-titles opening. [Editor's note: Certain death in television series means that tense space in time between the cliffhanger of the previous episode and the first three minutes of the current episode]. But his pre-credits run is telling; this episode is speedy and we'll dash through this post, too.

The run for your life plotting makes Antonia's next move extra distressing. She magically slams all the doors shut on the Moon Goddess Emporium, like she's Carrie White at the prom. Her former friends are now prisoners and coerced coven members. 

Is she planning to wipe them out once she's done with the vamps? CLICK FOR FULL POST.

The fallout from the vamps vs. witches battle that ended last week's eppy is this: Eric, "the blonde one", is under Antonia's spell, Debbie is so sad that Alcides broke his promise about Sookie that she starts using V again, and Alcides is so sad about lying to Bill that he gets more enmeshed with Marcus who has evil plans for Sam Merlotte. Nan and Bill argue mightily over the The Festival of Tolerance which will proceed despite the witch threat... a very bad idea since, yep, they attack. 

Despite the forward thrust of the narrative (never mind the actual thrusting but more on that in "sex scenes") which begins with literal running and ends with Sookie yelling "RUNNNN" into the camera, this episode is kind of all over the place, given distractions like Sookie's fuzzy focus erotic dream, Lafayette's ghost-possession storyline and all the werewolf vs. Sam business. Chaos reigns.

Body Count: 3 human guards employed by vampires (that's a high risk job on this show) and probably some more humans in the Festival attack; Sex Scenes: It's a fleshy episode, so FOUR (season 4 record!):

1. Sookie dreams of a Bill/Eric sandwich
2. Jason breaks Jessica's ever healing hymen in the back of a truck
3. Sam & Luna pitch about in a tent
4. Joseph Mangianello practices for Magic Mike by stripping for bed. Yes, that counts as a sex scene. (Shut up.)

Best Sookie Moment: Her long threesome-without-quite-the-actual-threeway (that old cover of Rolling Stone with naked Bill, Eric & Sookie will have to do for now) dream sequence was kind of ridiculously cliche but it was fun to see Sookie flip the old scenario of possessive men/vampires on its head.

I don't have to be yours or yours. I'm proposing that the two of you be mine.

Trashiest Moment: That cheesy-ass signage and Nan's eye-rolling about civil rights at The Festival of Tolerance; Funniest Moment: It's not a particularly comic episode. So this was more of a chuckle. Once Mavis's spirit has left Lafayette's body, he's immediately all Lafayette again, punctuating the grateful sentiment with a simple "you got it, bitch." Nice to have him back. Now if only his storyline would matter.

Real Sam charms. Fake Sam (aka Tommy) smarms.

Episode MVP: At last we can hand an episode to Sam since Sam Trammell again shows his (underused) versatility, playing leading man charm and goodness, and comical fake Sam who looks a lot like Sam but sure acts just like Tommy. Well done, Trammell; Episode Grade: B

P.S. This is the ugliest outfit you've ever seen a leading lady wear, right?

My eyes. My eyes....

 4.1 "She's Not There"  MVP: Marnie; Grade: C
4.2 "You Smell Like Dinner"  MVP: Eric; Grade: A
4.3 "If You Love Me Why...?"  MVP: Eric; Grade: B+
4.4 "I'm Alive and On Fire"  MVP: Sookie; Grade: B+
4.5 "Me and the Devil"   MVP: Arlene; Grade: A-
4.6 "I Wish I Was the Moon"  MVP: Pam; Grade: B
4.7 "Cold Grey Light..."   MVP: Jessica; Grade: B- 
4.8 "Spellbound" MVP: The Fortenberrys, Hoyt & Maxine; Grade: B+ 

Comments

[Morgan]

I like this season far more than the previous one, but I don't know - something just isn't gelling at all well with me, it never flows smoothly enough.

Teared up at Lafayette's storyline, but there better be more to that baby storyline please! Explain the split blood vessels/decapitated dolls - that's what I want to know!

Had to pause on Alcide's naked scene, that man is fine!

And Fiona Shaw is just amazing non?

[Derreck]

Oh, Sookie. Where are your priorities? She's in a dream with both Eric and Bill and proceeds to waste it. She even wonders why she isn't having a better dream about 'eating a whole pie without consequences.' (that did make me laugh though because i had a flashback to season 1's mournful eating of Gran's last pie.) I would've taken that dream elsewhere, but they wouldn't be able to show something like that on HBO.

is Arlene's baby still evil? or was that evil caused by that completely unneeded storyline with Mavis, the somewhat friendly ghost? Dang it, i still want an evil baby.

and at this point, Alcide could be completely written out and not make any difference whatsoever. Why bring him back if they have to shoehorn him in to the series? He's not even not even on Sookie's radar these days.

Things i liked the most: Sookie and Debbie team-up and Hoyt's 'monster' box (and later, Jason crossing out the words before he gave it to Jessica.)

[NATHANIEL R]

Derreck -- it's funny. i loved the "monster" box too. and my favorite moment was probably when Tara was like "are you even listening?" all quick-thinking there.

and yet i didn't mention either. it's hard to do this without spilling 300000 words. :)

[Ryan T.]

Don't disagree with giving Sam Trammell the MVP award, but I personally would've given it to Nelsan Ellis. Dead end story? Sure, but his acting was superb. And yes, his "you got it bitch" was probably the line of the night for me. That and Nan's "jesus fucking christ" under her breath when Sookie barged into the festival. Amen, vamp sister.

[Amanda]

Alcide/Sookie is inevitable, though I dread it for many reasons: Because I think Alcide is a blank and tasteless character that doesn't add much to the story, because Mangiello is not the best actor out there and because once again someone will fall madly, hopelessly and head over heels in love with sookie for no reason at all. And well, call me crazy, but I dont hate Alcide/Debbie. I see real feelings there, a true connection, honesty and a history between the two of them that strikes me as a true one. But no, another man must worship Sookie. This show should just change its name to "Everybody Loves Sookie".

Sam Trammel and Nelsan Elis are both acting the shit out of their storylines. Less Sookie. More Sam and Laff. Less Sookie, more Pam. Less Sookie, more Hoyt. Less Sookie, more anyone else!!!!

[Terence]

I loved this episode because it manages to set up what I'm sure will be a frantic last 3 episode of the season.

What's so interesting with the coven is how they allowed themselves to be seduced by the power of antonia and now can't seem to escape (literally) that mistake. Also debbie trying to help sookie is going to be disastrous for her and being back on V won't help.

Also, I think that sam is this season's MVP so far. His character has shown great depth and any opportunity to see him play tommy playing him is great.

And as for all the men falling for sookie, its partly because of the fairy blood.