Jodie is Single. And Singular.
Monday, January 14, 2013 at 6:31PM Jodie Foster broke the internet. That’s what happens when you are globally famous, drunk, accompanied by a persona non grata (one Mel Gibson) and come out as a gay person… again… sort of. Jodie was being honored with the annual Cecil B Demille award, a lifetime achievement prize earned at the young age of 50 (we’ve been celebrating her birthday lately right here) and her acceptance speech won the night’s most important intangible prize “Most Talked About”.
Why? Because it mattered.
Watching this storied actress battle with her past self and its direct conflict with The Way Things Are Now was amazing live television. We were watching deeply personal internal backstory play out as a public Living History right there on the television, intoxicated and intoxicating.
Consider that the reclusive actress/director also pretended to eat a stuffed animal just moments before the speech and that that was not the takeaway or the headline or even the meme the next day! But let’s not get distracted as it was so easy to do during Jodie’s mammoth whatishappening offkilter address to the showbiz nation which ABC transcribed for us.
“Well, for all of you ‘SNL’ fans, I’m 50! I’m 50! You know, I need to do that without this dress on, but you know, maybe later at Trader Vic’s, boys and girls. What do you say? I’m 50! You know, I was going to bring my walker tonight but it just didn’t go with the cleavage.”
“Robert [Downey Jr.], I want to thank you for everything: for your bat-crazed, rapid-fire brain, the sweet intro. I love you and Susan and I am so grateful that you continually talk me off the ledge when I go on and foam at the mouth and say, ‘I’m done with acting, I’m done with acting, I’m really done, I’m done, I’m done.’”
“Trust me, 47 years in the film business is a long time. You just ask those Golden Globes, because you crazy kids, you’ve been around here forever. You know, Phil you’re a nut, Aida, Scott — thank you for honoring me tonight. It is the most fun party of the year, and tonight I feel like the prom queen. Thank you. Looking at all those clips, you know, the hairdos and the freaky platform shoes, it’s like a home-movie nightmare that just won’t end, and all of these people sitting here at these tables, they’re my family of sorts, you know. Fathers mostly. Executives, producers, the directors, my fellow actors out there, we’ve giggled through love scenes, we’ve punched and cried and spit and vomited and blown snot all over one another — and those are just the costars I liked.”
“But, you know, more than anyone else, I share my most special memories with members of the crew. Blood-shaking friendships, brothers and sisters. We made movies together, and you can’t get more intimate than that.”
“So while I’m here being all confessional, I guess I have a sudden urge to say something that I’ve never really been able to air in public. So, a declaration that I’m a little nervous about but maybe not quite as nervous as my publicist right now, huh Jennifer? But I’m just going to put it out there, right? Loud and proud, right? So I’m going to need your support on this. I am single. Yes I am, I am single. No, I’m kidding — but I mean I’m not really kidding, but I’m kind of kidding. I mean, thank you for the enthusiasm. Can I get a wolf whistle or something?”
[Audio goes out]
“…be a big coming-out speech tonight because I already did my coming out about a thousand years ago back in the Stone Age, in those very quaint days when a fragile young girl would open up to trusted friends and family and co-workers and then gradually, proudly to everyone who knew her, to everyone she actually met. But now I’m told, apparently, that every celebrity is expected to honor the details of their private life with a press conference, a fragrance and a prime-time reality show. You know, you guys might be surprised, but I am not Honey Boo Boo Child. No, I’m sorry, that’s just not me. It never was and it never will be. Please don’t cry because my reality show would be so boring. I would have to make out with Marion Cotillard or I’d have to spank Daniel Craig’s bottom just to stay on the air. It’s not bad work if you can get it, though.”
“But seriously, if you had been a public figure from the time that you were a toddler, if you’d had to fight for a life that felt real and honest and normal against all odds, then maybe you too might value privacy above all else. Privacy.”
“Someday, in the future, people will look back and remember how beautiful it once was. I have given everything up there from the time that I was 3-years-old. That’s reality-show enough, don’t you think? There are a few secrets to keeping your psyche intact over such a long career. The first, love people and stay beside them.”
“That table over there, 222, way out in Idaho, Paris, Stockholm, that one, next to the bathroom with all the unfamous faces, the very same faces for all these years. My acting agent, Joe Funicello — Joe, do you believe it, 38 years we’ve been working together? Even though he doesn’t count the first eight. Matt Saver, Pat Kingsley, Jennifer Allen, Grant Niman and his uncle Jerry Borack, may he rest in peace. Lifers. My family and friends here tonight and at home, and of course, Mel Gibson. You know you save me too.”
“There is no way I could ever stand here without acknowledging one of the deepest loves of my life, my heroic co-parent, my ex-partner in love but righteous soul sister in life, my confessor, ski buddy, consigliere, most beloved BFF of 20 years, Cydney Bernard. Thank you, Cyd. I am so proud of our modern family. Our amazing sons, Charlie and Kit, who are my reason to breathe and to evolve, my blood and soul. And boys, in case you didn’t know it, this song, all of this, this song is for you. This brings me to the greatest influence of my life, my amazing mother, Evelyn. Mom, I know you’re inside those blue eyes somewhere and that there are so many things that you won’t understand tonight.”
“But this is the only important one to take in: I love you, I love you, I love you. And I hope that if I say this three times, it will magically and perfectly enter into your soul, fill you with grace and the joy of knowing that you did good in this life. You’re a great mom. Please take that with you when you’re finally OK to go. You see, Charlie and Kit, sometimes your mom loses it too. I can’t help but get moony, you know. This feels like the end of one era and the beginning of something else. Scary and exciting and now what?”
“Well, I may never be up on this stage again, on any stage for that matter. Change, you gotta love it. I will continue to tell stories, to move people by being moved, the greatest job in the world. It’s just that from now on, I may be holding a different talking stick. And maybe it won’t be as sparkly, maybe it won’t open on 3,000 screens, maybe it will be so quiet and delicate that only dogs can hear it whistle. But it will be my writing on the wall. Jodie Foster was here, I still am, and I want to be seen, to be understood deeply and to be not so very lonely. Thank you, all of you, for the company. Here’s to the next 50 years.”
In the history book chapters on the LGBT movement this one will be fascinating to see juxtaposed with Ellen Degeneres's very different bullhorn admission on magazine covers and her own television show so many years ago. That “Yep, I’m gay”, a double coming out which equated the public self (Ellen) with the private (Ellen Lee DeGeneres) opened the floodgates. I’m guessing that Jodie shuddered at the time given her feelings about mixing the two and her own privileged sense of ownership of her own life... her continual preferencing of her own comfort above her community's. And yet here she is all these years later, awkwardly but willfully performing her own Coming Out but still bristling that she feels compelled to do so.
While it’s true that Jodie has mentioned her former partner Cydney once or twice before publicly, those mentions have always been grossly overstated by those who wanted to claim her as an Out Celebrity and they've always been non-televised… which is an important distinction when it comes to the famous. She’s never stated her gayness THIS publicly. I had hoped that the sudden audio dropout – I believe we missed a whole sentence or two – was merely a cable glitch here in NYC but ABC accounts for it in the transcript. It happened at the worst possible moment in the speech when she transitioned from coyly joking about coming out (“I’m single!”) to rationalizing her lack of coming out through her continual private honesty. The LGBT community understands this better than their hetero counterparts but it’s impossible NOT to be politicized as a gay person. If you come out, others condemn you for politicizing your private life (read: making them uncomfortable) but if you don't you contribute, however non-malevolently its intended, to the repression and the homophobia that flourishes through societally-condoned ignorance.
Was that audio-dropped sentence the simple declaration that the LGBT community always wanted from her, a 'Yep, I'm gay' or just merely more talking around it? Jodie Foster is hardly the only closeted celebrity to have indulged in the maddeningly coy but basically honest tactic of never lying about your sexuality but for the lie of pretending it does not exist.
Yet when you read her speech back it suddenly doesn’t sound as incoherent or as dodgy as you remember it but braver... or at least more personal. Jodie Foster has never been fully at peace with the public nature of her life and she's fought so valiantly about that stance that you have to respect her for it, even if you've been angry enough to judge her for her silence over the years (as I and others have). Most celebrities who claim the right to privacy are crying wolf -- they'll talk about their marriage or the kid or their colonoscopy or whathaveyou in every interview but if a subject comes up they don't like they'll suddenly invoke their love of privacy. Really but you just said...?). But not Jodie. She's actually meant it. (Any more pliable or more people-pleasing actress than Jodie, would have been entirely undone and defined by the John Hinckley Jr story but in her absolute refusal to engage, it became a footnote).
I don't mean to equate a bizarre peripheral scandal that intruded on someone's life to their personal sexual orientation but when I draw the nonsensical squiggly lines between the two and her other peculiarly stubborn ways (see also: Mel Gibson), a clear portrait of the fierce actress begins to emerge. All things have a shadow side and her sense of entitlement to herself, damn all the rest, which may have saved her in many ways over the years, has done nothing to make life easier for other gay people, strangers and loved ones alike. But last night, she stumbled beautifully towards neutral ground and shared space. No one can claim that Jodie Foster didn't stay Jodie Foster last night. She clung as stubbornly as ever to that guarded sense of Self but with her one free hand she reached out to loved ones, publicly acknowledged their gift to her life, and layed an open hand right there on the world's table for everyone to see. Our move.
Here's to the next 50, indeed.
if you liked this piece, why not like The Film Experience on facebook?
previously on our Jodie's 50th birthday celebration: "Do you have a boyfriend?" Jodie at 17; "You wanna get high on Ripple?" Jodie in Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore; Playing Dress Up Jodie in Bugsy Malone; Sex & Sensibility Jodie in Maverick; "Acting shouldn't be your own form of therapy" Jodie at 25; Jodie is Wrong on the mandatory price of fame
Reader Comments (79)
I'm very much with Greg on this one. As if to hammer home the point that Jodie Foster's notion of privacy is a double standard instilled by homophobic cultural attitudes, Jennifer Garner gave a shout out to her husband 10 minutes later and no one batted an eye. There is a difference between what Jodie Foster calls "Honey Boo Boo" and living an honest life. In the end, the whole thing rings of hypocrisy. If she valued privacy so much, she'd would've stayed home with Maggie Smith. Instead, she stood on a soapbox and talked about how celebrities coming out now are attention seeking reality show stars (wow, pot meet kettle).
I tend to think that prominent LGBTQ celebrities should feel some compulsion to do their part to help the community. I am aware that all of what Foster has done has been in the background. Yet visibility is very important, too, and she seems to think it doesn't matter, when in fact visibility is one of the best tools we have to unravelling institutionalized homophobia. Just because Foster wants her privacy and doesn't want a life as a public lesbian to define who she is doesn't mean she has to scrub the entirety of her sexuality from her public persona and then get snotty and defensive about it. Not only is that kind of attitude fairly sex negative, but it shows that Foster belongs to a different era and way of thinking when it comes to how the LGBTQ community lives in the world.
I should mention that there are historical precedents for Foster's attitudes which we haven't even brought up here and which I think would show why her thinking is dangerous thinking. See John D'Emilio's "Sexual Politics, Sexual Communities", a book that tracks the rise of the Homophile Movement (pre-Gay Lib) for an explanation of why this dignified seclusion, this "wanting to be left alone", type of attitude has a number of significant drawbacks.
(On a side note, I don't really care that it was "her moment" -- I think when you're receiving an award, it's polite to be gracious. If anything, you could use the time to speak to a significant social cause. However, what I think is out of bounds is rambling on and on about how bad you've had it, particularly when you live such a privileged lifestyle. I'm an actressexual too, but maybe we can all check our cognitive dissonance for like 5 seconds and put Jodie Foster the actor we love aside from Jodie Foster the narcissist on Golden Globes night.)
At the end of the day, what I got out of it was that Jodie really just wants to have a kinky 3way with Marion Cotillard and Daniel Craig, but then again who wouldn't want that? ;)
In all seriousness I think the Honey Boo Boo child thing was just trying to demonstrate how extreme the culture of celebrity has become I guess?
Interesting comments!
If Jodie had come out earlier when some of you are suggesting, she wouldn't have had the big career I'm quite sure. She, like Ellen who had her sitcom cancelled not long after she came out, would likely not have been cast in the roles that won her either oscar nor the roles that made her a big box office star and millions. As a lesser star than the legend she has become, she quite possibly would have been seen as just another coming out casualty, like Rupert Everett. So judge all you want, but her comments at this point might have been perfectly timed - she's now an iconic, legendary, two time oscar winning actress with many successful films to her credit. And I'm quite certain that coming out is still a very big deal as evidenced by the publicity the speech has generated and surely when much of middle America seems awash in more evangelical christianisms that I'm assuming aren't exactly gay friendly. Not all of us live in big multicultural sophisticated cities and eat organic foods dearies.
I'm 24. I'm gay. I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years now.My parents know, my brother, my all time best friends. Only the people who I feel emotionally attached to know about it. Year after year, when I sit at Christmas lunch table, I always get the same questions from my grandparent, uncles...any girls around there? have you got a girlfriend? And what do I say?: I have a boyfriend and we are very happy together? No, I say: No, not yet. What I mean to say is: you come out when you feel comfortable, you come out to who you think is going to be understanding and supportive, you come out if you want, you don't have to do it if you are not ok with it. I don't owe Jodie Foster anything, nor she owes me anything either. If she wants to live a private life as I live mine, with my family, so be it. I respect her for it, and at the end of the day it's her life, she chooses what to do with it.
I'm gay, but I don't feel part of a 'community', and most of the times I don't feel I belong in that so called 'community'. I've decided to live my life 'publicly with my loved ones, not with everyone in the LGTB. Does Jodie Foster have to do something for the LGTB because she is a public figure? No, she doesn't. She can choose to be vocal, she can choose to be silent. She's not a worse person for the former.
Well, then I guess the ends justify the means, eh Ethel? BTW, I think Ellen is doing fine, and I don't think you can blame her sitcom being cancelled or Rupert Everett's relative inactivity on their coming out.
Plus, Foster came out in like 2007. Plus, what stopped her after winning the oscar for SotL?
One more thing -- apparently if you're not a big movie star queer, no one knows about you or your important impact on culture. If I have to hear one more missive about how brave and important Foster's speech was last night, I'm gonna barf.
"Most celebrities who claim the right to privacy are crying wolf -- they'll talk about their marriage or the kid or their colonoscopy or whathaveyou in every interview but if a subject comes up they don't like they'll suddenly invoke their love of privacy. "
Yep, and good for them. It's called boundaries. Everyone needs them. If someone asks me a personal question at a party, and I feel comfortable answering it, am I then obligated to answer every other personal question whether or not I want to? Celebrities don't owe us anything. If they're willing to talk about one subject but not another, then US Weekly is right: celebrities, they're just like us!
Thanks for posting the transcript of the speech. I understand it in ways that I didn't during the broadcast, and I'm in agreement. I believe she has always enjoyed acting and maybe even the fame, but it's now apparent that her life's mission has been the pursuit of normalcy alongside the celebrity. None of us can understand what the Jodie Foster Experience is like, even though we as a society, immersed in reality as entertainment, believe we can. She may not be the pioneer that the LGBT community has wanted, but she can be celebrated for her other achievement - the ability to marry celebrity and anonymity almost seamlessly. Perhaps if we celebrated that achievement, then the Honey Boo Boo Childs of the world would disappear.
@Tim: "If she valued privacy so much, she'd would've stayed home with Maggie Smith."
Thank you! No one forced Foster to accept that bogus Globes award in the first place! As said best on Gawker, "The key to privacy is SILENCE." Stay in your uber-privileged world as a closeted lesbian all you want to, but if you're going to go on national television and ask that people leave you alone (huh?), then expect that some of the public might have some issues with that. I'm all for focusing on the WORK alone and now the tabloidy stuff, but you know these types of celebs who only want you to focus on what they specify on their terms, and that's not necessarily just the WORK. Like, I need you to know about all of my political beliefs, my charitable contributions, my new perfume, my clothing line, where I'm vacationing, my baby's weirdo name, and the new cleanse I'm on to lose weight. But my sexuality and who I'm screwing, NO! Can't have it both ways when you CHOOSE to be a public figure who's living high off of the public's money, Miss Privacy.
And that line should have been "I'm all for focusing on the WORK alone and not the tabloidy stuff." My fault!!
Ricky so as a public figure she is pretty much fodder and everything about her personal life is fair game ? Come on! She does not have a perfume or clothing line (because she values her privacy) , she is privileged because of her acting talent and she has entertained people most of her adult life , she deserves a private life and be able to accept accolades if she choses!
That's not what the hell I said. If you're going to accept a silly award on national television and then proceed to condemn the public for not respecting your privacy when you're actively WANTING the public's attention and participating in the spectacle when it suits you, then yes, I think that shit is very convenient. Foster should be above all of that, but apparantly she isn't.
Foster also stalked by John Hinckley, Jr. when she was a child. Imagine that for a minute, before you attempt to judge her motives for anything.
Interesting points.
Just a couple of thoughts:
I think she mentioned Honey Boo Boo, because it's a toddler celebrity. She's been in the showbusiness since she was a toddler, and in her case she didn't go that route. Just an example of how things have changed.
Also, we see her life from our perspective now, when it's cool and it seems mandatory to come out. When she was a teenager (the Taxi Driver years), how many homosexual people in Hollywood would come out? How many old stars by then died without even doing it? In the times of the infamous Cruising? Common!
Even in her years of The Accused (in her 20s?) how many of us were out in our jobs/schools and demonstrating for our rights to get married? I'll tell you, I wasn't. Why are we asking her to have been ahead of her time and come out when that would've jeopardized her career?. Movie stars are not heroes or heroines. When a movie star comes out, she doesn't do it only for the hipsters in Urban Outfitters, nor for the bloggers, she's also doing it in front of the gas station guy in Utah, who's going to analyze her and condemn her upon a first glance at her. How many of us could endure that?
And I'm sorry, but the point that once you're a celebrity you have to deal with everything and refuse to have right to your privacy is bullshit. So, a prostitute who's a "public" worker has to be a prostitute 24hrs a day? So, if anyone wants to fuck her/him, they can because, hey, you refused to have rights once you got this job! That's such an incredibly mysanthropic view of life and humans !
I think it's important to remember that while there were not many out Hollywood stars in the 70s and 80s, there were a significant number of out politicians, community leaders, writers, musicians, and other kinds of public figures. Many of them did in fact face scrutiny from being out, while also winning a certain amount of acclaim for their bravery. I guess it serves to show that Hollywood was behind the times in regard to issues of sexuality for a number of years. I am torn. Part of me thinks Foster was a victim of this, but part of me thinks she's complicit in it. I think it's both, but given her substantial privilege since at least 1990 and based on her words and phrasing at the GGs, I err toward the latter. George Takei just wrote an interesting post about this, actually. I think where I stand after considering all of your opinions is that while I cannot blame Foster for her positions and ideas on sexual orientation and privacy given her background, I can't condone them, nor the way in which they were offered. I also can't condone people with notoriety and financial privilege not using their sway for a good purpose by publicly identifying as LGBTQ. Hell, I have no notoriety or public sway, but being queer is an important part of my life, not a shameful detail, and I'll gladly include it in my work and other aspects of my public life. I feel one has to if we want to make any dent against the institutionalized homophobia of American society.
Tim dear how old are you if it's not too impertinent a question. Foster is 50, so an age when she was coming of age that would have certainly been risky, embarrassing, etc. And while one's sexuality should never be shameful (unless used in shameful ways) because it's a natural part of the human process afterall, talking about who one likes to fook, publicly, as a famous person, might not be everyone's cup of tea.
A Harvard educated, law professor friend of mine made the following comment on Facebook today which I thought was interesting - So someone comes out and they do it their way and its weird and the queer community jumps down their throat and condemns them for doing it wrong and too late. Hmmm. Good role modeling for others who are scared to come out.
Actually, it is too impertinent a question since you apparently think my age (which you'll never know) dictates my opinions more than my experiences and what's between my ears. And your "dear" is condescending to boot. Wow, I'm starting to think the starf***ing tendencies on this site are out of control. Countercritique Jodie Foster's opinions on the closet and watch her legions of admirers get all worked up.
Your Harvard educated friend (his credentials mean nothing to me, btw, and speak volumes about the sheer magnitude of establishment thinking here) forgets that Jodie Foster invited critique when she defensively turned her nose up at the importance of sexual identity, whilst criticizing fellow queers. You can't stand on the soapbox the way she did and manage to dodge scrutiny. If you read above, you'll note that I can't blame Jodie Foster for what appears to be internalized homophobia, but I'll be damned if I'm going to call her actions brave. As Ricky said, she'd have been welcome to stay in her uber-privileged white lesbian movie star closet and enjoy her privacy, but instead she decided to self-advertise, hypocritically I might add.
Plus, I repeat -- she came out in 2007, so her GG speech was actually less a courageous come-out and more of a passive aggressive, attention seeking, and self-aggrandizing swipe at the queer community. That's the only way I can explain it. I can abide her dictating her own terms of coming out, but I can't abide her using the bully pulpit to prescribe her timidity about public sexuality to others. It's called dialogue.
You know, after some slight confusion/anger after the initial "I'm single" joke, I thought it was a pretty clear, very personal speech. I especially appreciated how it was radical but calm - she never lost her cool or got swept up in the emotion of what she was saying, but rather laid it all out on the table as coolly and calmly as possible. My Facebook feed exploded with cries of "WTF IS GOING ON?" but curiously all of those were from straight people. All my gay friends chose to either not comment or remark what a great speech it was. I don't think she left anything up in the air - the very first words out of her mouth after the sound went out were "I came out years ago," after all.
I get the people saying how hypocritical the speech was - being presented with a Lifetime Achievement Award onstage at an internationally televised event is probably not the best place to make a speech about protecting one's privacy - but Jodie's career and life outside her career have been so odd and singular that I don't think there would ever be a "RIGHT" place/time to say the sort of things that were obviously on her mind. We might never know why she felt she needed to say these things at this moment, but I think it was just as good a time/place as any other. And she certainly made sure she was heard, that's for damn sure.
What's unfortunate is that a whole lot more is riding on her career now - "closeted" movie stars will be waiting and watching with baited breath to see if her prospects/box office take any serious hits - but she's not really at a place in her career where she wields a lot of box office clout anyway (and probably really doesn't care about it all that much). For all the wonderful good that Jodie's speech did (and it did, it really did), we still don't know what happens when a "closeted" star comes out when they're enjoying a career high. I hope that someday we will.
Anyway, BEAUTIFUL piece, Nathaniel. Easily the best-written piece I've seen about Jodie's speech.
Dear, I mean Tim, why won't you tell me your age? I'm 97. But seriously, given this is all so anonymous, that an anonymous person who I don't know in anyway won't tell me their age is quite water off the back indeed.
My Harvard education friend (mentioned Harvard to suggest that some intellectual thinking went into the comment, that is all, not to name drop, but are you also against higher education one ponders... the noose tightens I see) is actually a female lesbian, not a he.
These comments certainly prove Jodie is in one of those damned if she does, damned if she doesn't, can please all the people all the time situations, so why bother I supposed. As a gay woman myself, the level of vitriol from the gay community (tho maybe more leaning to the while male activist... I've seen as many rapturous comments) is truly frightening. Oh, pardon me while I step back into the closet!
"But seriously, given this is all so anonymous, that an anonymous person who I don't know in anyway won't tell me their age is quite water off the back indeed."
Ok.
"mentioned Harvard to suggest that some intellectual"
Going to Harvard doesn't make you an intellectual. Being an intellectual doesn't make you right.
"is actually a female lesbian, not a he."
You're very right, I should've used "his or her." My apologies. I try to be careful about that; I often use "she" or "her" alone when I write hypothetically since I am a feminist. This time I lapsed. Patriarchy sucks. I hope it doesn't keep you from engaging fairly with my points.
But while we're on the topic of assumptions...
"but are you also against higher education one ponders... the noose tightens I see"
I had hoped not to do this, because I don't like to lean on titles as a crutch in debates, but I am earning a Ph.D. in English with expertise in gender and sexuality in American culture at a leading American institution. So, no, I am not against higher education. I am, however, against some of the stereotypical assumptions that because someone is highly educated they are also 100% right all the time. I value higher education greatly, but institutionalized thinking is not infallible thinking. My own participation in academia very often rubs up against my queer radicalism.
"These comments certainly prove Jodie is in one of those damned if she does, damned if she doesn't, can please all the people all the time situations, so why bother I supposed"
I think you're not understanding that I'm engaging with Foster's ideas and actions, which are generative, not with her personage. If I can heap any praise on what she's done, it's that she's provoked discourse. I could care less about Jodie Foster the person, and I think the fact that I do care less about Jodie Foster the person would please her, given her views on privacy. I certainly do not think that she is "damned if she does, damned if she doesn't." For one, the majority of people are heaping lavish praise on her and saying how noble and brave she is. Plus, even if they weren't, she's rich, white, and happy. The only damning would be media damning, which is pretty much simulated flagellating anyway.
"As a gay woman myself, the level of vitriol from the gay community (tho maybe more leaning to the while male activist... I've seen as many rapturous comments) is truly frightening. Oh, pardon me while I step back into the closet!"
Again, what I wrote above, but I actually agree with you here; white male activists are definitely more privileged than white lesbians (although they are probably all considerably less privileged than Jodie Foster, Rosie O'Donnell, Ellen Degeneres, etc. etc. etc.). And for the last time, Jodie Foster came out in 2007. No one is taking issue with the fact she came out now or that she came out; what I, and many others, are taking issue with is her aggressive stance toward the way other public figures have come out, a stance she's taking from an incredibly privileged position, delivered with quite a bit of undeserved pompousness. We are taking issue with her notions of privacy and her nostalgia for a time in the gay community that never really existed. I do think she could've come out in the 1990s, and I would have liked it if she had done so, as it would have sent a great message, but I understand that people have to make their own well-considered decisions about how and when to come out (as she did in 2007, quietly with respect and dignity). I take exception with a lot of other things she said.
Read John D'Emilio's book on the history of the Homophile movement "Sexual Politics, Sexual Communities" if you want to get a sense of why some people might be upset with Foster's views on sexual privacy. However much they work for Foster personally, they're problematic as social prescriptions.
*couldn't care less.
Sorry to devote a whole post to fixing a typo; I just hate it when people do this and I didn't want anyone to use this against me (which would be petty).
TIM-- I absolutely agree that Foster's sexuality privacy issues are problematic as social prescriptions (nice way of putting it but i changed it to sexuality since no one expects Jodie to comment on her actual sexual behavior) but for me the speech was a fascinating document of a public figure trying to come to grips with a world that demands they be different than they are. This is how Jodie is wired and she's always been so obstinate that I think she's had trouble undoing her inflexibility about it even as the world --- and countless LGBT people in it who are fare less fortunate than Jodie -- has shown us a better healthier way. I thought this write up was really balanced so I'm surprised to hear the anger about the "starfucking" tendencies of the site
and what is this mythical coming out in 2007... was this that very inside industry speech she gave where she thanked Cydney? that speech was much more casual and barely went viral (as I recall) and wasn't on any show watched by millions but happened to get discussed online a bit ... and i don't think that counts. And clearly Jodie knows that we don't think it counted since everyone has always been looking for a big statement from her (aka, THIS STATEMENT... however reluctant and Jodie-guarded). I respect your passion and I am happy for dialogue -- and I share a lot of the anger that other gay people have about closeted celebrities -- but let's all be polite to each other. please and thanks.
ETHEL -- i do think you can't really win with the gays online so I hear you. But then, can you win online. period? the level of vitriol towards all public figures is pretty scary sometimes... one frequent TFE reader tweeted on Globe night "Anne Hathaway is sincere -- LET'S GET HER" which was kind of a brilliant joke about the way people always pounce on that girl because she seems to be enjoying her good fortune and gets emotional about it in theatrical ways. If you don't enjoy your celebrity people pounce cuz you're a bitch and entitled and if you do you're seen as needy and desperate for attention. It's probably very tough to be a celebrity apart from, you know, the ease with which you can then move through life financially and the adulation you can receive for the slightest things.
RICKY -- i see your point. (Maggie Smith. hee.) but i think you have to grade these things on a curve and Jodie is far less hypocritical about her I'M A PRIVATE PERSON thing than just about any celebrity who says it... except maybe for the celebrities who don't say it and just keep to themselves.
Nat -- I thought your post was somewhat balanced, although I would've liked more critique directed toward Foster; that said, the "starfucking" comment wasn't directed at you so much as some of your readers. Sorry about the edge on some of my words; I am a little worked up over the issue (and thought some people were writing to me disrespectfully). I also get frustrated when just because we like someone's work we're afraid to scrutinize their opinions. I think things are pretty high stakes for LGBTQ people and I think culture matters (I'm sure you agree), so the things Jodie Foster said kind of upset me. To me, she struck first, and culture should be a dialogue between celebs and ourselves!
I think the 2007 coming out counts, and I respected it, too. I thought when she did it that it was a good way of being publicly honest and visible while also staying true to her principles about personal privacy. I didn't like this one because of how snarky it was toward other queers. But I guess we'll just have to disagree on that one -- I'm not sure how we parse out whether it counted or not. :-p
I like your site a lot, regardless of where we disagree. I also think Les Miz sucks.
Tim -- if the 2007 one counted, this one counts too. Neither of them were "i'm here i'm queer" proud. In truth i didn't have it in me to criticize her because I really felt sympathy for her this time. She was famous as a little child and stayed famous and this speech more than any other moment in her career has helped me to come to grips with all the ways in which I can't imagine what that's like. That said, obviously I have more respect for stars who lay it on the line to make the world a better place (Ellen, Melissa, etcetera) but i do think we owe any public figure who comes out -- even if they're somewhat wobbly about it -- some degree of respect. I mean, look at the dearth of male movie stars who'll do it. At least Jodie is braver than them!
all that said, it really frustrates me when people cite Rupert Everett as someone whose career was damaged by coming out. That is absolutely false imho. He was basically always out and his career had a number of big breaks most of which he personally admits to having squandered in his less bitter more self-reflective moments. Plus he is well known to be "difficult" and that counts in careers too. If you're not well loved you're going to have a tougher road to sustained success.
@Ricky
If it means anything to you, I support you....
This is a great thread.
I lost my partner to AIDS in 1995. We were together 10 years. I was crushed for many years after. Jodie Foster doesn't owe me one damn thing.
That is all...
Interesting to add to the discussion; Victor Garber apparently "just" came out -- hasn't he been out for a long time too? (i.e. he goes to events with his partner and mentions him in interviews)
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/01/15/victor-garber-comes-out-gay_n_2479102.html
@rick: It does. :-) I'm glad that someone got where I was coming from. I'm new here.
Ricky where you're wrong is making the leap that because she accepts an accolade she has no business talking about the value of privacy. The accolade is for her work. There are many actors who are private and show up to award ceremonies. Her privacy rant was more about why she's spent her life being as private as she's been. It was as Nathaniel said, a comment on the changing of the times.
As someone who has been in the spotlight all her life and had to deal with being hounded by nutjobs, including one who shot the President for her, people should be completely understanding of why Jodie Foster has always craved privacy. Imagine how scarred she is by her experiences. She shouldn't have to leave the business as an answer to be private because she is fine with promoting her films. She just doesn't want to promote her private life. She did the right thing by acknowledging her partner and the people she loves when she wins an important award. That is what the also-private Daniel Day Lewis does.
What's interesting is people in her community have been begging for her to come out. She finally does on her own terms and she gets the most negativity coming from people in her own community whining that she should have done it 20 years ago or that she didn't come out the way they wanted her to. Way to make people feel comfortable with coming out. Attacking someone who does on national television in her own way.
Why am I wrong? B/c you say so? Next. She could have said "thank you, HFPA" and sat the hell down. She didn't, and some people didn't gush over her "coming out" or "assault on the media." That's life.