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« Links: Oscar, Kubrick, Jones, Knightley, and Ado Annie | Main | Trailers for Short Oscar finalists »
Friday
Oct302015

CAST THIS: Actressexual Ocean's Eleven

Hi, everyone. Coco here, with a fantastic opportunity for all agents and casting directors out there...

 Indiewire reports an Ocean's Eleven sequel is in the works, and that it will feature an all-female caper crew. Clooney is producing, Olivia Milch (Little Women) is writing, and Gary Ross (Seabiscuit, Hunger Games) is directing. The biggest news for Actressexuals: Sandra Bullock has landed the Danny Ocean role. 

Bullock's star-persona is a little goofier than Clooney's ultra-suave schtick, but she seems like a great choice nonetheless. Very few performers ooze of charisma as strongly as Bullock. I mean, I still find myself thinking of her speaking "Chinese" at the Oscars from time to time.

The bigger question, though, is what other wonderful actresses should join her and her team of madcap con artists. Here are some options:

Melissa McCarthy: McCarthy and Bullock had great chemistry in The Heat, so who wouldn't love a reunion? The only problem I can think of is the fact that McCarthy is already committed to the Ghostbusters reboot. Would two all-female franchise revivals be too much? 

Reese Witherspoon: Listen everybody, this is where the Reeseurgence takes flight. Just think of Reese playing the Brad Pitt to Bullock's Clooney. 

Lily Tomlin: Ocean's Eleven had its share of older mentors with Elliott Gould and Carl Reiner. Tomlin's on everybody's mind right now thanks to Grandma, and we all know she'd be really funny in the role. 

Julia Roberts: Well, she's already been in the Ocean's movies. And even if you weren't a fan of her infamous impersonation of herself, you should consider the following possibility: Roberts and Bullock were the queens of nineties comedies, wouldn't it be great to see them share the screen? 

Angela Bassett: Because she should be in every movie, don't you agree? Maybe she could play the villain?  

Mary Tyler Moore: Is she in good health? Because wouldn't it be cool if this television legend played the Carl Reiner role in a wink to The Dick Van Dyke Show

But here's the fun part: What would you cast? Go ahead, sound off in the comments! 

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Reader Comments (37)

Female directors can't even catch a break directing movies like this...

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterAlex

Wow! What a thought!

Let's see...

Cate and Kate as Clooney and Pitt
Regina King as Andy Garcia
Tilda as Don Cheadle
Jenny Slate and Kate McKinnon as Casey Affleck and Scott Caan
Gugu Mbatha-Raw as Matt Damon
Louis-Dreyfus as Elliott Gould
Zhao Wei as the grease "man"
Angelica Houston as Sal
Anna Kendrick as the electrician/computer guy
Selma Hayek as Frank Catton

and Chris Pine as Tess. :)

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSawyer

Kathleen Turner as the boss!!

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterDAVID

It's probably because I just started Scream, but Drew Barrymore seems like a good fit for this.

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJS

And it's probably because I'm going to watch Scream 2 after this, but let's throw Jada Pinkett Smith into the mix as well. And should I go for broke and watch Scream 3, Parker Posey.

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJS

Can we find a way to get Meg Ryan in somehow? She needs a comeback of her own, and she's the last point in the 90s Rom-Com Queen Trifecta. Her neurotic energy would fit well in the techie role played by Eddie Jemison.

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterdenny

Some great suggestions, I say no to Roberts just because her presence would be too much of a reminder of the first film.

Here's a few other thoughts:

Well obviously Lupita Nyong'o should either play the Don Cheadle role or because of her youth one of the comic duo played by Scott Caan & Casey Affleck. Can she play comedy?

MTM isn't very well from what I understand and I think her sight is mostly gone so it might be tough for her but how about Eva Marie Saint or in the best of all worlds Angela Lansbury!

Yes to Angela Bassett, how about Rachel Weisz she'd make a cool and classy safe cracker.

Let Emma Thompson be Sandra's partner and Reese could play the Matt Damon role.

Marisa Tomei should be in there somewhere. I could see her taking over for Andy Garcia as the take no prisoners casino owner. Although Glenn Close could rock that part as well.

As far as who could play the Sandra's ex taking over Julia Roberts role any of these would be most welcome:

Clive Owen
Nathan Fillion
Colin Firth
Sean Bean
John Hamm

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterjoel6

Sawyer: Swinton? She's not a bad actress, far from it in fact, but c'mon: If anyone takes over for Don Cheadle in the gender flipped version of this, it's Katie Jarvis. Regardless of racial background, the hook of that character was about radiating "British street", which, as talented as she is, is NOT Tilda Swinton.

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterVolvagia

Don't write Sandra Bullock and Julia Roberts in the same sequence. There is no such a thing as a trifecta of rom com queens.

There is only Julia Roberts. Everybody else belongs to a third-tier league.

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered Commentercal roth

I like some of your suggestions:

Sandra Bullock - George Clooney
Reese Witherspoon - Brad Pitt
Emily Blunt - Matt Damon
Idris Elba - Julia Roberts
Jean Smart - Elliott Gold
Rosario Dawson - Don Cheadle
Dakota & Elle Fanning - Casey Affleck/Scott Caan
Sherri Shepherd - Bernie Mac
Lily Tomlin - Carl Reiner
Parker Posey - Eddie Jemison
Ellen Wong - Shaobo Qin
Tilda Swinton - Andy Garcia

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterremy

You just know Meryl Streep will be involved somehow

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterRami

I sure hope it's not too literal of a sequel. Let the female characters differentiate themselves.

I have no idea what the writer has in mind, but I agree that Drew Barrymore could kill in something like this.

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered Commentercash

Nicole Kidman
Cate Blanchett
Julianne Moore
Kate Winslet
Jessica Chastain
Marion Cotillard
Viola Davis
Lupita N'yongo
Alicia Vikander
Tilda Swinton
Jennifer Lawrence
with Emma Thompson
and Meryl Streep

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJoseph W

Oh my God, what a playground! I'm just gonna spitball a roster of actresses with a colossal amount of charisma who are consistently underutilized.

Naomie Harris, Lucy Liu, Juliette Lewis, America Ferrera, Gugu Mbatha-Raw, Jamie Chung, Carmen Egojo, Marisa Tomei, Elisabeth Moss, Lorraine Toussaint, Tessa Thompson, Rutina Wesley, Isla Fisher, and Gina Torres!!!!!

Any of them! All of them! Lady heist movies YAS!

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterMargaret

Weaver. That is all.

And heck, why not someone like Imelda Staunton or Brenda Blethyn for some British class

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterMikey C

LISA KUDROW!
I'm sorry I hope I'm not too loud.
LISA KUDROW

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterRizz

If not Mary Tyler Moore, I'd love to see Carol Burnett in such a role.

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJohn T

Jessica Chastain
Viola Davis
Sarah Paulson
Kristin Wiig
Marsha Mason
Taraji P. Henson
Christine Lahti

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterbrookesboy

Jacki Weaver as the elder stateswoman of bank robbers, please and thanks.

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterEvan

Mess. Writers actually can produce original material.

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJono

Rusty Ryan (the Brad Pitt role) has to be played by a mid-30's-to-mid '40s woman with the same effortless sex appeal and coolness at this point in her career. So: Angelina, Charlize, McAdams, Banks, Byrne, Sevigny, Deschanel, Kristen Bell, Christina Hendricks...

And there's gotta be roles for Judy Greer and Mo Collins in this.

PS. Let Eva Green and/or Cotillard be villainesses.

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterPaul Outlaw

Some quick ideas, sorta hewing to similar ages/ethnicities:

Rosamund Pike - Brad Pitt (she's sexy, funny and can flip between characters)
Tatiana Maslaney - Matt Damon (ditto)
Mary McDonnell - Elliott Gold (dammit, I wish I could say Madeline Kahn or Jill Clayburgh)
Sophie Okonedo - Don Cheadle (Hotel Rwanda switch!)
Brie Larson/Karen Gillan - Casey Affleck/Scott Caan (Brie's long been a scene-stealer without trying; I want so much more for Karen than Selfie)
Grace Jones - Bernie Mac (because obviously)
Estelle Parsons - Carl Reiner (still acting, still hilarious)
Mae Whitman - Eddie Jemison (experienced in large ensembles, still crushes it)
Michelle Yeoh - Shaobo Qin (because she needs to be in way more)
Charlize Theron - Andy Garcia (she's so good when she's bad)

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJames

Regina King! I could totally see Cameron Diaz in the Brad Pitt role and Queen Latifah would also make a good fit. Maybe not the most "prestige-y" choices, but they'd be fun.

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterthefilmjunkie

I'd pick the following, mainly because I think they're all limber performers who I'd like to see in this sort of setting:

Viola Davis
Bridget Fonda
Lisa Kudrow
Uma Thuman
Michelle Yeoh
Rose McGowan
Alfre Woodard
Lucy Liu
Rachel McAdams
Laura San Giacomo

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterben1283

Beth Grant or no one at all!

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterChris

The rest of the cast should be every other actress who was with her in that legendary 1995 Vanity Fair Hollywood cover. It would be epic.

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterAbel

OK, Sandra Bullock=George Clooney
Scarlett Johansson=Brad Pitt
Gugu Mbatha-Raw=Don Cheadle
Anna Kendrick=Matt Damon
Fan Bingbing=Shaobo Qin
Jena Malone=Casey Affleck
Olivia Thirlby=Scott Caan
Pam Grier=Elliot Gould
Ellen Page=Eddie Jemison
Octavia Spencer=Bernie Mac
Meryl Streep=Carl Reiner

& Introducing Channing Tatum as Tess...

Julia Roberts=Andy Garcia

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSteven

Rose Byrne as the Pitt to Bullock's Clooney.
Ellen Page as her apprentice.
Marissa Tomei is a good neurotic type.
Maggie Q because there needs to be someone good for an action scene.
Kathy Bates as the older wiser character.
Shirley Maclaine could be a scene stealer, fills the legend quota.
Catherine Zeta Jones because they need to bring back someone from the other films.
Darby Stanchfield, Laverne Cox and Rashida Jones because they are funny, good in an ensemble and we need less expensive names to round up the cast.

October 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterV.

These suggestions are delightful. Here's some of my favorites of what's been suggested, plus a few others.

Sandra Bullock: George Clooney
Charlize Theron: Brad Pitt (Paul Outlaw)
Gugu Mbatha-Raw: Matt Damon (sawyer)
Elle Fanning & Dakota Fanning: Casey Affleck & Scott Caan (remy)
Angela Bassett: Don Cheadle
Pam Grier: Bernie Mac
Jena Malone: Eddie Jemison
Sally Field: Carl Reiner
Gena Rowlands: Elliot Gould
Maggie Q: Shaobo Qin (V)
Anjelica Huston: Andy Garcia
Nathan Fillion: Tess Ocean (joel6)

October 31, 2015 | Unregistered Commenteradri

@remy: wait, you're right! Ellen Wong would be perfect as Shaobo Qin! I didn't recognize her name at first, as Knives in Scott Pilgrim.

October 31, 2015 | Unregistered Commenteradri

"Would two all-female franchise revivals be too much?"

That's not a question in these parts. :)

I'd love Gena Rowlands to be a mob boss villain with Tilda Swinton as her bodyguard.

October 31, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSanty C.

And how do we get Allison Janney up in here?

October 31, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterPaul Outlaw

Get Ava Du Vernay to direct, so she gets a chance to make a thrilling heist comedy with her own auteristic touch, just like Soderberg did his.

October 31, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterCarlos

Andy Garcia - Penelope Cruz

October 31, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJaragon

I say get rid of Sandra and reunite the cast of Nine!

October 31, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTom

Or we could have a huge strarry female cast work on something ORIGINAL???!!!!

October 31, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterjamie

I can't believe nobody has mentioned Helen Mirren until me just now. Surely Helen could fit in there somewhere?

November 1, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterEz
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