Beauty vs. Beast - Black Widow vs. The Hulk

I can't tell you how proud I am to be hosting JA's weekly series "Beauty vs. Beast". I feel like a giddy reader each Monday just wondering which amusing sophie's choice he'll pose. But he's in Italy this week so I'm your substitute pollster.

I wanted a poll where I wouldn't know who would win. I caught up with Thor: The Dark World recently (for reasonszzz) and I'm about to leave for a screening of Captain America: Winter Soldier so Loki & Black Widow are both on the brain. Remember that great tense scene in The Avengers where the Hulk is after The Black Widow? Remember how they both stole that whole movie via outsmarting or smashing Loki? It's a literal Beauty vs. Beast this week

poll by twiigs.com

Voting Continues!
Both this poll and the Talented Mr Ripley "Tom vs. Dickie" poll are open until Sunday when JA returns from Italy.

The Link Is Not Yet Rated

Vulture features a fascinating memoir about a troubled 70s childhood and the not-optimistic catharsis of TV's 70s superhero show The Incredible Hulk
Awards Daily Sasha never misses a beat with director David Fincher and his new muse Rooney Mara. Have you seen their Calvin Klein ad? What's most shocking about the ad (to me) is that Rooney SMILES in it. Can you imagine? Not the smiling sort at the cinema, you know.
Variety Halle Berry developing an indie comedy called Mother. Her frequent producer is directing but his filmography is suspect!

Zap2It "Giant Colin Firth statue emerges from lake in London's Hyde Park" a most clickable headline, don't you agree?
Awards Circuit wonders where we're not looking for Oscar contenders for this year's race. Any under the radar guesses?
Salon's description of US Weekly in this article about their "zoom-in" interactivity with paparazzi photos of Angelina Jolie's cleavage made me LOL
My New Plaid Pants "do, dump or marry" with the men of Pacific Rim: Idris Elba, Charlie Hunnan and Rob Kazinsky
Salon speaks about and to Guillermo del Toro as Pacific Rim, his first film in 5 years if you can believe it given how ubiquitous his name has been in that time frame, nears release

Finally have you heard that Los Angeles banned this Project Runway ad from appearing on billboards? I don't get it.

This nudity is so safe. This is only side cheek nudity. The models aren't even in sexually suggestive poses. But hey, Project Runway has got to do something to get people talking now that it's 12 seasons old. (I hated "TEAMS" so much, I can't even. It really turned me against the show). I think this would have been a much braver funnier and more successful ad if they had all of the new contestants naked and worshipping the hosts. It would have also been more controversial since imperfect regular-person bodies really alarm people. Partially because you don't see them in the media very often. But, tell me, why was this ad banned? I've seen much worse on public display. I didn't even feel the need to hide it "after the jump". But sex, like violence, is a terribly inconsistent thing when it comes to public policy and censorship. TV has adopted film's extremely forgiving and casual relationship with violence now (they'll regularly show things you couldn't see in an anything other than an R rated movie just a couple of decades ago) and I can't any longer get a hold on what you can or can't say in terms of profanity on the small screen. But sex -- it's always sex -- still manages to get people flustered and "that's obscene!" even when it isn't. A few nights ago while channel surfing I chanced upon some sort of reality show wherein the contestants were dropped naked onto deserted islands - like an "Extreme!" riff on Survivor. They even had "Naked"  in the title. And the nakedness was blurred out.

Les Línkables

TMZ life imitating art - Shawarma sales skyrocketing in LA after The Avengers opening.
Coming Soon has a new photo from the set of Les Misérables. I'm choosing to interpret this set as an homage to Moulin Rouge!'s greatness
Acidemic would like you to know that 1933, not 1939 was the greatest year at the movies.
Playlist Maybe Edgar Wright is going to make that Ant-Man movie after all.

Antagony & Ecstacy looks back at Ang Lee's Hulk (2003) in the wake of the new green giant fever sweeping the nation. Really interesting piece.
In Contention Gene Kelly centennial tribute hosted by the Academy next week in LA. Someone go and tell me all about it. We'll celebrate his centennial here in August (the actual month of his birth)
Movie|Line Jessica Chastain finally passes on a movie. Hee!
SuperPunch has photos of Wal-Mart's The Avengers set. I include this only because its rabidly sexist. I believe when the camera spun around the heroes in that highly publicized shot it was The Black Widow and not Loki who was part of the heroic team. (sigh) 
Kenneth in the (212) Fun couples: Woody Allen and... Lindsay Lohan? 

P.S. This is the best thing that Kate Beckinsale has ever done.

Republicans, Get In My Vagina! from Kate Beckinsale

Told ya!

Off Cinema.
It's sometimes worth stepping out of the movie theater. Rarely but still...
The Realist for those of you who've spent too much time on Facebook
Playbill weirdest music news of the week. Twisted Sister's Dee Snider recording an album of showtunes with Broadway friendly guest stars

Hulk Smash Box Office!

Here's one of the very smartest things about The Avengers that I read all weekend and surely a sign as to why it's handily smashed opening weekend box office records with its mighty $200 mil.

Perhaps people like The Avengers so much because it celebrates a triumph of branding. The Hulk reinforces his brand by blending together a sensitive, indie, yet still hunky Mark Ruffalo with a green, childlike, cartoonish embodiment of aggression that smashes things.  Viewing the film is like watching Pepsi chat with McDonalds ironically about the inadequacies of Apple as Facebook dons a blue mask before ripping Nike's hammer away in a fit of pique."
-The Film Doctor

I haven't read this elsewhere but I think it's worth noting that this exact same weekend 10 years ago was also historic. Spider-Man (2002) was our first ever $100+ opening weekend. In ten short years the booty has practically doubled but in Spider-Man's defense they have raised ticket prices radically in that span of time. I liked The Avengers but the only way I'd see it again in theaters is if I can find a matinee 2D screening.

Hulk crush Harry Potter & Batman © Nathaniel Rogers

TOP FIFTEEN 
01 THE AVENGERS new  $200.3 Review
02 THINK LIKE A MAN  $8 (cum $73)
03 HUNGER GAMES  $5.7 Review (cum $380.7... and suddenly looking far less likely to stay the #1 movie of the year)
04 THE LUCKY ONE  $5.5 (cum $47.9)
05 THE PIRATES! $5.4 (cum $18.5)
06 FIVE YEAR ENGAGEMENT  $5.1 (cum $19.2)
07 THE RAVEN  $2.5 (cum $12)
08 SAFE $2.4 (cum. $12.8)
09 CHIMPANZEE $2.3 (cum. $23)
10 THREE STOOGES $1.8  (cum $39.6)

11 CABIN IN THE WOODS $1.5(cum. $38)
12 JOHN CARTER  $1.3 Review (cum $75) 
13 21 JUMP ST  $1 Review (cum $133.9)
14 AMERICAN REUNION  $.8 (cum $55.3)
15 THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL new $.7

What did you see over the weekend? I checked in at the The Bext Exotic Dame-Packed Hotel... which I'll write a little something about soon. If they were going for counterprogramming against The Avengers maybe they should have opened in more theaters? With Hotel's high per screen average and a weak showing for everything but the superheroes (and a strangely resurgent John Carter. What's going on there???), I bet they could have opened in the top ten. Then again, I assume Manhattan's very mobile elderly get out to the movies far more often than their counterparts elsewhere. It seems impossible but we may have been the youngest people in the theater.

Linksplosion

Scribble Junkies wonders if short men make better directors
My New Plaid Pants sneak peaks End of Watch with Jake Gyllenhaal and Michael Pena
IndieWire Oops, we deleted the movie. The growing pains of digital cinema
Cinema Blend Joss Whedon on his success with The Hulk. Speaking of...
Tom Shone thinks the Hulk is the only thing he got right.
Huffington Post thanks the foundations laid down in the Whedonverse for The Avengers success
USA Today gets good quote from the Core Four in The Avengers. And everyone has a good laugh about Mark Ruffalo in his motion capture phase. The man himself:

The first day of the leotard I said, OK (expletive), get a good laugh. Let's just get it out in the open. There was a lot of snickering and off-color jokes about the leo part of my tard. I don't think that needs explaining. 

Wow Report the best job in Hollywood is...
ASME announces the best magazine covers of the year. Truly odd choices here, I have to say. Mila Kunis' GQ cover is the only actress cover featured. 
Guardian sad legal battles over the Zsa Zsa Gabor estate. The famous actress is 95 and is probably not long for this world
Forbes released their list of the 100 Most Powerful Women in the World. The highest and only ranked actress is Angelina Jolie at 29 (unless you think of Beyoncé #18 as an actress). 
Newsorama has a ten-wide list of things we've learned from The Avengers... but it's more about what Marvel Studios can learn from it. 
The Mary Sue Brave's Princess Merida already showing up at Disney parks 

Theater Watch
Potentially terrible news for New Yorkers. The fate of the awesome Zeigfeld Theater on 54th street is up in the air. That's a pity. This is hallowed ground we're talking about. It's one of the few single screen ginormous theaters left. It's where I saw Moulin Rouge! for the first time. It's where I saw Michelle Pfeiffer in the pflesh and its the only suitable place for big deal starry movie premieres in Manhattan. Please don't close up!

This Weekend's Must Read...
The Hairpin points us to this amazing Elizabeth Berkeley interview right before Showgirls (1995) came out. It's hilarious and fascinating and sympathetic in retrospect. So much titillating delusion.

I thought, ‘I have to do this.’ I mean, this role, I would kill for. It’s very rare you read a script where the whole focus of the film is on a woman. Also, I’m so passionate about what I go after and I really felt a lot of connection with the character right away...

The bottom line is the character is so emotional. She’s constantly on the edge of a breakdown so that was hard because what’s two minutes in her life was 17 hours for me. There was one scene in particular where I’m on stage auditioning for the showgirl spot where Alan Rachins’ character is wanting me to put ice cubes on my nipples. That was so difficult. Everyone on the set just felt really upset by it because the fact is that goes when showgirls audition. I mean, it’s part of the process.  

Authenticity!