Final Oscar Predictions!

Hello beloved readers and fellow cinephiles. Sorry for this ultra-last-minute prediction post (which is cross-posted at Towleroad) but let it serve a dual purpose. It's to be read now and/or laughed at after the Oscars once I've shown that my crystal ball is totally defective.
One of these three films will win Best Picture
If you've been living under a rock the Best Picture field looks like so...