would you rather?

It's time for our silly celeb-fantasy game courtesy of instagram 

...growl at Halle Berry and Pedro Pascal?
...look as fab as Anya Taylor Joy despite a hangover?
...visit Mallorca with Rossy de Palma?
... hit the museum of ice cream with Selma Blair?
... go broom-shopping with Lauren Weedman?
... get sandwiched by Janelle Monae and Tessa Thompson?

Pictures are after the jump to help you decide.

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Cannes Red Carpet Lineup: Auteur Couture and Formal Turbans

More Cannes fashion madness...

MARGARET: We're back on the red carpet. bringing you the latest in movie star couture though we're a solid ten hours behind the proceedings. (And more since Nathaniel randomly selects gowns from multiple premieres)

ANNE MARIE: So glad I could sweep in at the last moment. I've been enjoying the Red Carpet you, Nathaniel, & Jose have been having over the past few weeks! And the best part of doing a Red Carpet Round up is that nobody throws you out for wearing the wrong shoes!

MARGARET: Cannes in particular always brings in a satisfying range of stylist-curated glam to nonchalant idiosyncracy. Which brings us to Agnes Varda, looking very much herself in... what would you call that ensemble?

ANNE MARIE: Varda chic? Auteur Couture? The advantage of being a living legend presented with awards from one of the most internationally acclaimed film festivals is that you can dress however the hell you want. This is pretty similar to what she wore when I saw her at AFI fest two years ago.

MARGARET: Watch that two-tone hairstyle get picked up by some trendsetting model and suddenly be all the rage among the young & hip.

ANNE MARIE: I have a theory that her hair looks like that because she was dipped in the river Seine like a French Achilles, and the only part of her that wasn't submerged was the top of her head. (This would also be a good time to announce that Agnes Varda will be the focus of next month's Women's Pictures, because we love her almost as much as Cannes does.)

MARGARET:  Now let's look at this collection of ladies bringing the color: Mindy, Sienna, Andie, and Jane. If I squint at the miniature, I can imagine each of their gowns as a fun piece of accent jewelry.

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Cannes Jury: Coen Bros to Boss Auteurs & Pretty Things Around

We've long since known that the Cannes jury would be headlined by Joel Coen and Ethan Coen, better known as The Coen Bros, the world's most famous sibling auteurs (though not the only of course: see also the Wachowski siblings, the Dardenne Bros, and more). We now know who'll be joining their jury and therefore deciding those incredibly prestigious prizes like the Palme D'Or, the Grand Jury Prize, Best Director, Best Actress and more.

As usual the jury is a mix of directors from multiple countries, one non-actor/non-director, and a beautiful actress or, um, three. In fact the jury is almost half women this year. The jury is, from top left:

• Joel & Ethan Coen  (US), filmmakers
  How many masterpieces would you say they're up to now?
• Rossy de Palma (Spain), actress
  You know and love this Picasso-assymetrical godess from Almodóvar's oeuvre
• Guillermo del Toro (Mexico), writer/director
  Of Pan's Labyrinth & Hellboy fame. Can't wait for Crimson Peak.
• Xavier Dolan (Canada), writer/director/producer/actor/costumedesigner
  The film world's youngest all-purpose cinematic godsend
• Jake Gyllenhaal (US), actor/object-of-obsessions
  He's testing his range and still hasn't found his limits. He's only getting better. This is a good get for a super actor whose entire family is in the biz. 
• Sophie Marceau (France), actress/director
  One time Bond girl and Braveheart co-star, diversified into directing in her home country
• Sienna Miller (UK), actress
  Her career is on the upswing after starring in two Oscar favorites last year 
• Rokia Traoré (Mali), composer
  She doesn't have many film credits but you can learn about this African goddess here 

With more actresses than usual and two men (Jake & Xavier) who are every bit as gorgeous as your typical Cannes jury actress this is an unusually easy-on-the-eyes jury. Will their various aesthetics mix well or will the jury awards be a series of compromises?  We shall always wonder... even after the official prizes are handed out late next month since they don't exactly let press into the jury room. 

Julianne is Dope. Also: Links

The Far From Heaven team cleaning up at the Indie Spirits in 2003IndieWire so it looks like it's really happening *sniffle* Julianne Moore is moving to television. After that Sarah Palin telefilm turn she's doing a pilot for an HBO series called Dope.

But it's not all bad news: Todd Haynes and Christine Vachon are involved so it's essentially the great Far From Heaven team. Cross your fingers that it's worthy of their collective gifts! It'll have to be really really special to be that. 

The series would be set in the 1950s and is based on this novel. Publishers Weekly describes Moore's character like so.

Josephine "Joe" Flannigan, is a former heroin addict and hooker who has recast herself as a petty thief and con. Working her home turf, New York City's Hell's Kitchen, she is taken up by a mysterious well-to-do couple to find their addict daughter, expelled from Barnard and lost to the streets. 

So there's room for great acting. We shall see.

The Linkies
The Wrap Patti Smith is working on a biopic of sorts -- it's based on her memoirs of her early years with photographer Robert Mapplethorpe in the late 60s/early 70s -- with screenwriter John Logan. Who on earth could play Patti Smith? She's kinda strange looking and Hollywood only hires beauties. Here's what they looked like when the movie would take place.

ArtsBeat David Cronenberg's A Dangerous Method will get a gala screening at the NYFF.
Latina Antonio Banderas on his long artistic separation from Pedro Almodóvar 'tween Tie Me Up! Tie Me Down! and The Skin I Live In (coming soon... and also getting a gala NYFF screening).

And speaking of Almodóvar, how amazing is this Rossy de Palma wall art by Adrian Valencia? I went to his site via a series of Lady Gaga drawings that are just stellar. 

© Adrian Valencia, 2011

 The Funnies
Ultra Culture "Cowboys and Aliens Fact Sheet"
My New Plaid Pants Quote of the Day from Jean Claude Van Damme [nsfw] 
The Hairpin an amusing review of Rise of the Planet of the Apes with drawings 
I09 "ten vestigial traits you didn't know you had". Robert Gonzalez, who wrote this, is funny. 
Bachmanneyezed a new tumblr